Sexual assault is not just a woman’s issue, it impacts both men and women. Men and women are both victims of sexual assault. As a man, it is likely that you will know someone who is a survivor of sexual assault – a friend, family member, girlfriend.
Women often turn to male friends for support and understanding after an assault. Your support and understanding can aid their recovery.
Although most survivors are female, approximately 5% of survivors are male. Men are assaulted by other men, and sometimes by women. It is important that male survivors seek services and talk with someone about what has happened. Free and confidential services are available.
For positive change to occur, it is critical for men to become involved as part of the solution, rather than continuing to be viewed as “the problem". Men become a part of the solution by educating themselves on the issue, confronting negative behaviors of friends, and challenging behaviors and attitudes that may lead to sexual assault.
Rape Prevention for Nice Guys
Because of the high incidence of rape, especially acquaintance rape, women have a hard time distinguishing the "nice" guy from the potential rapist. This hurts all men and all potential relationships. For positive change to occur, it is critical for men to become involved as part of the solution.
What can men do to become part of the solution?
Approach gender violence as a MEN’S issue.
Make sure that the sex you are having is consensual. Do not accept the myth that "no" means "yes." Understand that submission is not consent. Do not make assumptions about consent, ASK for consent.
Remember that having sex with someone who is drunk is sexual assault. If an individual is drunk, they cannot legally consent to sex (they cannot make an informed, rational decision).
Communicate clearly how you feel and what you want. Listen to your partner. Do not rely on body language.
Do not make assumptions about consent based on style of dress, body language or previous sexual activity. ASK for consent.
Understand, and help friends understand, that sexual assault is assault, and has little to do with sex.
Do not remain silent, do not look the other way. Become an "active bystander" – confront friends who are becoming disrespectful or abusive. Intervene when a friend is making a decision that could have devastating consequences.
Examine your attitudes about women and men that may perpetuate sexism and violence against women.
Interrupt actions, comments or jokes that support rape and other acts of violence.
Student Counseling Services
Campus Box - 2420
Illinois State University
Normal, IL 61790-2420
309-438-5489 (TDD) Contact Us